No Sudden Movement

As I contemplate hurling myself and my stuff across country again, I wonder if it is all worth it. I have moved every year, if not twice, for the past 10 years. Only amazon.com appears to be keeping track, so I go there to find a list of previous addresses for a background check. Apparently this is my one constant, I order books whereever I go. What am I looking for? Stimulation? Economic opportunity? Economists and sociologists would likely attribute it that, anthropologists to culture, public health professionals to improved opportunities to live healthy productive lives... whatever.

The best answer I can give is fear of boredom and stagnation. My twin scales are trying to find some point of peace between this sentiment and love for people and place. For they are what I love, bittersweet from afar, my people and my place. In looking from a distance, their details become fuzzy and idealized and I wax sentimental. Up close, like a gaping pores in a shaving mirror, I see their flaws. I can't decide whether this dispasia is self-imposed, a mental illness, or a product of an external pressure from modernity, capitalism, etc. Is dissatisfaction justified? Depression or a warped way of looking at things? The natural product of our culture?

So anyway, no answers yet.